Plastic-Eating GMO Whales Sink Fishing Boats
Future Fake News - June 3, 2047
SAN DIEGO, CA — After decades of oceans around the world being polluted by plastic waste, the entire marine ecosystem was in jeopardy. Countless species such as sea turtles, dolphins, seals, and whales were dying from entanglement or ingestion of plastics hazardous to their health.
Baleen whales are filter-feeders who consume plankton, krill, and other small sea creatures by swimming with their mouths open and sieving the food through their teeth. Such whale species were becoming endangered due to excess consumption of microplastics and the decline of plankton populations. Despite government bans on single-use plastics, there was no way to easily remove the billions of tons of plastic waste already in the ocean.
To address the issue, scientists at UC San Diego used gene-editing technology to bioengineer bowhead whales (a species of baleen) to be able to safely consume and digest plastic while filter-feeding. The genetic modification allowed bowheads to thrive and multiply while also cleaning up polluted seawater in the process. Thanks to the GMO whales, plastic bags and bottles have been all but eliminated from the seas, and the marine ecosystem has been rebalanced. However, there were some unanticipated side effects.
Although there is now plenty of plankton available in the seas, the genetically-modified whales have developed a permanent taste for plastic. With trash no longer an option, bowheads are searching for alternative sources of plastic. The whales, which can reach sizes of over fifty feet long, have begun to eat commercial fishing nets and the plastic hulls of yachts and sailboats, causing several vessels to sink. Other bowheads are attacking surfboards, kayaks, and scuba divers. Some whales have even beached themselves in an attempt to eat umbrellas, shovels, and pails.
Angry fishermen and yacht owners have called for the plastic-eating whales to be hunted and killed, but conservationists and environmentalists have proposed an alternative solution. They will begin dumping millions of tons of plastic straws into the ocean to feed and placate the GM-bowhead whales.
